


Lean On Me

by PathOfNevermore



Category: Adam Lambert (Musician)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-09-03
Updated: 2011-09-03
Packaged: 2017-10-23 09:16:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 811
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/248681
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PathOfNevermore/pseuds/PathOfNevermore
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It was a struggle, like it was every time. The screaming, the swearing. It just couldn’t be without those things and both of them knew. These were the moments that already announced themselves hours, sometimes even days beforehand, and then suddenly struck like thunder.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Lean On Me

_Lean On Me_

It was a struggle, like it was every time. The screaming, the swearing. It just couldn’t be without those things and both of them knew. These were the moments that already announced themselves hours, sometimes even days, beforehand, and then suddenly struck like thunder.

He yelled at his boyfriend, at Adam. It seemed louder than last time or the time before and it scared Adam, even though he’d never admit it. After all, he was the only one who could reassure Tommy. The only one whom Tommy trusted.

So Adam just watched as Tommy yelled at him. So he didn’t do anything as Tommy slammed the doors and searched through his bags. None of them knew what he was looking for. It scared Adam, but not cause he feared for himself. Not in the least. No, every time his boyfriend was like this, Adam was scared for Tommy. Of what he could possibly do to himself.

Tommy’s bags were empty. Their content was all over the floor. He cursed loudly and sat down in a corner of the room, slumping against the wall. Tears seemed to win from his angry façade. Adam nodded slowly and approached him. He knew better than to stop Tommy in the middle of moments like this. He had tried once and he would never again.

Slowly, Adam kneeled in front of his boyfriend. “Tommy, baby?” he whispered. Tommy didn’t look at him. He was ashamed and Adam knew.  
“Tommy. Hey.” His voice was ever so soft, as if he was speaking to a baby animal he didn’t want to scare away. But Tommy’s hands still trembled like they had a few minutes ago. Still no answer.

Adam carefully approached him, but didn’t touch. “Do you want to tell me about it?”  
Tommy shrugged. He still tried to hide the tears, so Adam just ignored those. “Did something happen?” he tried, worried even though this had happened more often than he could count on the fingers of one hand.  
Tommy shook his head. “Nothing happened,” he reassured Adam. “I’m just so done with it. I’m so done with all of it…”  
What it was that Tommy was done with wasn’t something he’d tell Adam anytime soon, but that was okay. The singer nodded and put his hand on Tommy’s knee.

“I’m not weak.”  
It was just a whisper and Adam barely heard him. He nodded. “I know, baby.”  
“So why does this keep happening? I don’t want it,” his boyfriend whimpered.  
“You worry too much, that’s why it keeps happening…”  
“I do not worry too much!”

Adam smiled sadly.

“I’m _not_ weak.” Tommy came closer to Adam now and Adam encouraged him by taking his hand. As soon as their bodies touched, Tommy sat still again. A few months ago on a moment like this one, he’d told Adam he was way too embarrassed to be so close. Adam had smiled and had carefully put his arms around Tommy.   
Just like he did now. The bassist sighed softly as anger made way for tears – more tears. “I’m not weak.”  
“I know, baby.” Adam kissed his forehead. “I know.”

It was cold in their hotel room, but Adam didn’t dare to move. He and Tommy stayed on the chilly floor for several more minutes. Tommy’s head was on Adam’s shoulder and Adam silently caressed his hair.

Only when Tommy’s tears had dried, Adam released him and stood up. “Come on, bedtime.”  
Tommy nodded, but didn’t move.  
“Come on,” Adam told him. “You can really use it.”

Tommy was still shaking when Adam helped him up. Together they walked to the bed and Tommy immediately slumped down on the bed, sighing thankfully. His muscles ached and he was so, so tired. “Damnit.”  
“I know.” Adam kneeled in front of him and carefully took off Tommy’s shoes and socks. He put Tommy’s creepers next to his own boots, before he came back to Tommy. The bassist looked exhausted.

“Do you want me to help you?” Adam whispered. He was surprised when Tommy nodded. He was proud, Tommy, and this wasn’t something he usually let Adam do.  
He barely cooperated when Adam took off his pants and shirt. “I’m so goddamn tired,” he mumbled.  
Adam kissed his lips. “It’s over now.”  He quickly took off his own clothes and helped Tommy into the bed. He lay down next to Tommy and put his arm around him, whispering sweet nothings to him. Tommy was crying softly again, but Adam knew it was okay. They’d be awake till early morning and then Tommy would tell Adam what had upset him so much, like every other time this happened. After that they’d fall asleep, to wake up again late afternoon. They had time.

But for now Tommy cried softly and Adam held him, as long as Tommy would need him to.

 

 

 

 

 


End file.
